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A Letter to Mrs. Chung

on February 21, 2012

Dear Mrs. Chung,

We received the news today from our agency that we will not be able to adopt Han because you have chosen to adopt her into your family. Understandably, we are heartbroken. We have been dreaming of bringing her home for so many months, and this loss will bring us much sadness and grief.

However, from one mother to another, I want to write to you to tell you that I understand. Our hearts are breaking, because we have fallen in love with this baby girl through pictures and videos throughout the past 10 months. But you have fallen in love with her while holding her in your arms every day. She is your daughter already, and she has been since you held her in your arms as a newborn baby. You are the only mother that she has ever known. Now you will be her mother for a lifetime.

Our feelings of sadness and loss are overwhelming today. But we know in our hearts that Han will never have to experience the loss of the first mother she ever knew. She will not have to adjust to a whole new culture, a whole new language, and a whole new country. She will be spared many losses, although we are grieving a tremendous loss tonight.

I want you to know that we will always consider Han a part of our family. We have prayed for her and for you for 10 months, and for years before we ever saw her face. We will never forget her, and we will never forget you. I wish for you and for her all the best in life. Although we never had a chance to meet, I feel we will always be connected by our love for this precious baby girl.

With Love,

Kelly Harrington


4 responses to “A Letter to Mrs. Chung

  1. Lisa Schubring says:

    I do not know you personally, but as another adoptive mom with a son from Korea, my heart breaks for you. You are truly an amazing mother and living the true selflessness that is parenting. You and your family are in my prayers.

  2. LH says:

    I saw your blog on facebook. As a mother waiting 11 months, I just want to say your letter is amazing and I am very very sorry for your loss.

  3. Jean says:

    I am so incredibly sorry for your loss and admire your strength (even if you’re just phoning in that strength right now). Please, please tell me you won’t have to “start again” in the referral process. I agree with the sentiments you shared with Mrs. Chung, but it is heartbreaking too.

  4. JSL says:

    I found your blog via a friend on FB. I am also an adoptive mom and my heart ached for you when I heard the news. I am however, so encouraged by your selflessness and grace evident in the letter that you wrote to the FM. I pray that the Lord would be your peace through this tough time and you would find comfort knowing that He still has a wonderful plan for you. Thanks for sharing with us your heart.

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